Tuesday, 17 July 2012

Confidence, What is too much?

Confidence has always played a vital role in my life, whether it has appeared when needed or in fact not appeared at all.

In any career, especially performance based confidence is a key factor.
You need it to give you the adrenaline to perform in front of millions of people or a few people who can change your career forever.

Over the years whilst performing both acting and singing I have met a lot of people who have similar goals in life to me. And they all seem to differ from me in one way.
They have mounds of confidence, in themselves and what they do. Which is a great thing to have!

But the question is, when does confidence become over-confident?
and when does cockiness and arrogance start worming there way in...

From my experience and from my perspective I find most (not all) people who are in my profession to be intolerable. Their confidence spreads into their everyday life which causes an over dramatic side to follow with great speed. And sitting there talking to someone about themselves all day doesn't strike me as a day I would enjoy.

My view on drama/acting/singing is this:
I act when I need too, I sing when I need too and I don't let it take over me.

I am believe it or not quite a level headed person who also enjoys using the right side of my brain as well as my left side. I like that I can do this, but it also means I don't quite "fit in" anywhere...
I love drama, music and writing, but I also like the logic of a good political debate or working with computers.

Most people in the performance profession are creative and not much goes on with logic, I would say emotion takes over like in a performance.

You may think I am being quite biased but I have a mother who is an opera singer and I have performed since the age of 8, so you would think I would be all for over-confident!
But living with a dramatic mother all of your life puts a dampener on the excitement it is supposed to bring.

I also think there are a lot of factors with confidence, but here are just a few;
-Good looks
-Good figure
-Actual talent
-Multiple talent (can sing/act/dance/play an instrument)
-Being supported from a young age
-And most important LUCK!

You can be the most talented person in the world, but unless you are at the right place at the right time you won't get anywhere...
I've been taught this from a young age and I believe it to be the truth!

When I get all of the above ^ I will let you know how the confidence thing is going....
Who knows I might become the thing I most hate!


I would love to hear people's opinions on the subject and there experiences, and like I said I love a good debate ! 

Thursday, 12 July 2012


Does anyone believe in Karma anymore? Is it just a worldly phenomenon that we get our just deserts or  is it just coincidence that what goes around comes around?

The fact is that is what I've been asking myself today.

I am a very opinionated person and sometimes that conflicts with others especially those who lack outside views on the world. I can also just be hated by people for being myself.
I suppose this is bound to happen in my lifetime. Some people were born to make friends and keep them. I on the other-hand have a couple of friends I keep in touch with but I would not say I have those people that have stuck around.
Which is quite a sad thing to admit to yourself...

I have realised that I am who I am, even if that's someone who is still learning/growing which is what everyone is doing.

I don't like being hated or disliked for no reason, because the fact being is that is in fact a childish thing to do.
I've learnt over my lifetime not to do, although it is hard not to judge people I try and accept everyone that is nice to me. If not then that is a reason to dislike. But hatred is such a strong word. I must say I don't think I hate anyone even if I use the word.

Well, today I have decided to be the bigger person and this is my pact:

I am going to apologise to everyone who I have done a wrong too. Even if they perhaps have been as horrible if not more horrible to me. I am going to make a mends with people. If those people let me.
If not I will still be the bigger/more mature person and in the end that is something to be proud of.

But in the end I know my destiny in life might not be to make friends.
It might lead to a life of acquaintances but that is something I will have to accept.

In the end, how sad it is to admit.
I like being alone. I've grown accustom to it. 

But having that one person by your side who is your boyfriend/best friend helps.

Anyway, moral of the blog...

I'm going to apologise/make amends/be the mature person.

Wish me luck.